I'll be Alright without you, I Promise
by tvaddict1223
Summary: After discovering Matt slept with another woman, Gabby turns to the one person she could always trust to help her figure out what she wants to do about her life and her relationship with Matt. Follows 3x15, short multi-shot.
1. I'll be Alright without you, I Promise

A/N: A short one-shot that popped into my head following episode 3x15. I hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Chicago Fire and just enjoy writing fics for fun.

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I'll be Alright without you, I Promise

Gabby wasn't entirely sure how she ended up here, of course deep down she knew she shouldn't be surprised. She didn't let many people completely into her life, but she was defiantly one of the exceptions.

She settled down on the hard, frozen ground. She shivered slightly as she settled against the large piece of stone marking Shay's grave. She hadn't been here much since her death, the guilt and grief making it almost unbearable. The first time she had been here since the funeral was after Antonio had killed Gish. She suddenly found herself here more often then she would admit to anyone.

"How did things get so messed up?" She asked the headstone, wishing more than ever the person it honored could be here with her. "He slept with someone else. The new captain's ex-wife."

She sat in silence for a moment, letting the freezing wind carry her words. She let the statement hang in the air, almost imagining Shay's face as she said them. Although, she is sure that if Leslie had still been here she would've never let Gabby call off the engagement in the first place, even to just put it on hold until she finished her candidacy.

"I know you never would have let me do it. I regret it, I miss him." She let the admission hang in the air, picturing Shay's smug yet sympathetic grin clearly. "We were doing so much better, I thought we agreed to wait… I just assumed he didn't want to be with anyone else."

She shifted, trying to get a bit warmer but to no avail. She could also feel the tears returning to her eyes, the one's she wiped away furiously as she fled the firehouse after shift. She was thankful she hadn't found out sooner, only having to avoid everyone for about an hour before she could make her escape to talk to Shay.

"God, I'm such a bitch," She muttered suddenly, "I should've brought flowers or something. You were always the one who was good at taking care of me." She smiled remember the good times she and Shay had shared, but it only led to more tears.

"I miss you most of all," She quietly admitted to the stone. "You always knew what to do, you were always there no matter how badly I screwed up. I've really screwed up, Shay." She let the tears fall freely when the only response was a bitter wind, not that she expected anything else anyway.

"I'm lost, you know. Being a firefighter is great and all, but I feel like I've lost a lot more than I've gained this year." She stuffed her hands into her pockets, her left one making contact with the old photo of the two of them she had begun carrying around. "I would do anything to get you back."

It was almost as if she could hear Shay talking to her, telling her to pull it together in one of her many pep talks. She couldn't get Shay back, she had to let that go. She did what she could for her, she helped bring the identity of her killer to light. She now had to live on for her, without her.

However, there was still one person she could get back. If she wanted her happiness she would have to fight for it. Forgive, grow and move on. Get back to the ending Shay and she had gushed over in the ambulance when she first got together with Casey.

"You are the best friend anyone could ask for," She whispered to the headstone through tears as she prepared to leave.

"Dawson?"

Gabby whipped her head around, furiously wiping at her eyes as she scrambled to her feet. Severide approached, a bouquet of flowers in his hands and a concerned look on his face, "Hey."

"Are you okay?" He asked trying to get a better look at her face as she avoiding eye contact.

"Fine," She said moving around him, "I'll give you two some privacy. Love you, Shay."

She hurried away from the headstone, ignoring Severide's repeated questions. Severide didn't need to know about her conversation with Shay and honestly she wasn't sure how she was, she just knew how she wanted to be.

Gabby started her car and sat in silence for a moment, collecting her thoughts. She drove through the streets of Chicago to Brett's place. She found parking easily and grabbed her bag out of the back seat, heading for the house.

"Gabby," She stopped in her tracks, turning to find Matt stepping out of his truck. How had she not noticed him, "Can we talk?"

She took a deep breath, "Sure, come on in." She led Casey into the house and to what she was sure was going to be a long talk. She closed her eyes for a moment and sent her love to her best friend as she prepared to fight for her own happiness, repeating the words Shay had said to her not so long ago, _I'll be alright without you, I promise._


	2. Fixing Stupid Mistakes

A/N: Hello wonderful readers! The lovely reviews inspired me to continue this little one-shot a bit. I have a few more ideas to add to this, so here is the first of those.

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Chicago Fire.

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Fixing Stupid Mistakes

Gabby wondered if Matt could hear her pounding heart in the silence as she led him into the house. She dropped her bag in the living room, thankful that there was no sign of Brett. She stood facing him, her back to the kitchen were only days ago things had seemed so much better between them.

They stood there in silence for a moment, both waiting for the other to say something, "Do you want something to drink?"

"Oh, no, thanks," Gabby was relieved, she did not want to go back into that kitchen with him. Unfortunately, this still left them standing in silence.

She had finally had enough, "You said you wanted to talk, Casey."

"I wanted to apologize about Beth…"

"Stop," Gabby cried, her voice coming out raspier than she wanted it to, "I really don't need to hear about the girl you slept with."

"Okay," Matt held up his hands in surrender, returning the room to silence for a second, "I didn't cheat on you."

"I know that!"

"Okay, but you're still mad."

"I'm not mad," Gabby snapped quickly before taking a deep breath. If she wanted this to work she would have to talk to him. That was their problem last time, "I'm upset, confused."

Matt immediately softened, almost reaching for her but somehow thinking better of it, "You are the one who wanted to take a break. Focus on your candidacy."

"I did, but I thought after our talk…" She took a moment to work out the words, "We said we were putting us on hold."

"I didn't realize that meant not seeing other people."

"I didn't realize you wanted to see other people," Gabby shot back just as fast.

"I don't," He growled.

"Well it didn't seem like that when you slept with Beth! I had to find out from Welch! She was at the firehouse!"

"She was there to see her soon to be ex-husband, the new chief." Casey admitted quietly as he sunk down on the couch.

Gabby let out a strangled sound, between a laugh and a cry, "Well isn't that just perfect. You sure know how to pick them."

"Hey," He rose off the couch, "What do you want from me? I was prepared to spend my life with you, you called it off."

"Put it on hold. You were the one who told me it was okay, for my career."

"You moved out! I thought we would keep the engagement quiet, not split."

"This is getting us nowhere," Gabby sighed as she rubbed her hands over her face.

Matt let the silence sit in the room for a moment, "I was going to tell you… about what happened."

Gabby's stomach lurched at the thought of that conversation, "That might've been worse."

Matt sighed, "What do you want from me Gabby? We can't be together, but I can't be with anyone else. You can't have it both ways."

"I know," She sighed. This was it, it was now or never to make a choice. They couldn't keep playing this game, "I was wrong."

Matt's head snapped up at her quiet confession, "What?"

"I don't want to put us on hold anymore." He stood up and moved towards her, "I thought it would be worth it, but it's not. I really messed up."

His arms moved to rub hers comfortingly, no longer afraid she would lash out if he touched her, "You didn't mess up, but you have to be sure this time. Is this what you really want?"

She nodded without hesitation, "You?"

"I always want you," He hesitated for a moment, "Can I kiss you now?"

Gabby didn't answer, pressing her lips against his in a passionate kiss, her arms wrapping around his neck as his moved to her waist, "I missed you."

"I missed you too," He wholeheartedly agreed as his rested his forehead against hers, "Let's not do something this stupid again."

"Agreed," She hummed before kissing him again. His hands wandered, untucking her work shirt and spreading warm against her back. She broke apart from him for a moment, "My room, Brett might come home."

He nodded, kissing her hungrily as she led the way out of the living room and into her bedroom. Gabby's mind flashed back to their first night together, him showing up at her apartment just as she was leaving to find him. Their kisses were hard and passionate, clothing quickly littering the floor of her bedroom.

Matt lowered her onto her bed, quickly following and finding her mouth again, "I love you."

"I love you, too," She answered, "Now, shut up, Lieutenant."

"Yes, ma'am."

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It was a few hours later when Gabby watched from bed as Matt gathered his clothes from her floor, he turned to her with a smile before breaking the moment, "How are we going to do this?"

"What do you mean?" She asked concerned as she sat up in the bed.

"Are we together? Engaged?"

"Together," Gabby answered, "I think we should start new. Forget the past and take it slow."

Matt raised an eyebrow at her, "This was slow?"

She rolled her eyes, "You know what I mean. From here on out we take our time, do better."

He grinned, moving to kiss her, "I agree. We will get it right this time."

"We have to," She agreed.

"We have to be careful. It's not Boden we are dealing with."

"We keep it out of the firehouse. Just the two of us for now."

"Brett and Severide, we both have roommates. We will never have a moment alone."

Gabby sighed, "I still think we should keep it to ourselves for a bit. At least until we figure out how to make it work."

"Okay," He agreed, kissing her one more time. "I need to go, I have a construction job in the morning."

Gabby nodded, suddenly sad at the prospect of him leaving, "Okay."

He kissed her again, "I'll call you tonight. We will figure this out."

Gabby nodded before speaking, "Tell Severide. I'll tell Brett. We can trust them, and then at least we can be together outside of work."

"You sure?"

"Positive."

Matt smiled and nodded as he continued to get dressed. Gabby moved to put on some lounge clothes before walking with him out to the living room, "I'll talk to you later?"

"Absolutely," He agreed kissing her again. "How about dinner tomorrow night? Our first reunion date."

"That sounds amazing," She agreed as he kissed her one more time, they only separated at the sound of a gasp.

"I'm sorry," Brett squeaked, "I uh, didn't know."

Gabby smiled at Matt as she waved him off, he moved quickly by Brett and out of the house, "I guess we should talk."

"I brought wine," Brett offered as she moved further into the house and Gabby laughed, "Tell me everything."


End file.
